


How to explain a bad finale?

by StillWinchester



Category: Supernatural, Supernatural RPF
Genre: Crack, Episode Fix-It: s15e20 Carry On, Gen, Humor, I don't know what I wrote, Multi, Parody, Spoilers for Carry On
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-18 14:02:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29119401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StillWinchester/pseuds/StillWinchester
Summary: Like a title. It's a parody!
Relationships: Blurry Woman (Supernatural: Carry On)/Sam Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester (AU)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 14





	How to explain a bad finale?

**Author's Note:**

> It's some shitty parody because I can't believe what the hell happened in the finale. Dean was so OOC, and I dunno why Cas doesn't meet with Winchesters, so time to explain this!

**How to explain a bad finale?**

“But, first, you got to put everything back the way it was. The people, the birds, Cas. You got to bring him back,” yells Dean to Chuck. He needs to say this because it would be rude to not mention Cas even once. Dean knows deeply in his heart that Chuck will refuse, but he says it anyway. Typical Dean. 

A FEW DAYS LATER:

' _Fuck Cas_!' thinks Dean. Unfortunately, not literally. Jack makes some glorious speech, and Dean could ask about Cas at least twenty times, but he prefers staying there like an assbutt.

“Goodbye,” says Jack and disappears. Whatever. Dean gets to the Impala, and everything is awesome. Oh, he has a dog, and it's almost like Cas. Because Cas is kinda like a talking dog. Peachy.

*

Castiel is resurrected. 

Time is different here, so he can go back to Dean at once. He tries to find him with his powers, and he's so surprised because Dean is in... Brazil? 

Okay, Cas appears in Brazil. Dean is wearing weird clothes, but he's still hot, so Cas doesn't care. AU!Dean whistles when he sees a devastatingly handsome angel.

Dean Winchester is bisexual in every universe, so that fake version in Brazil falls in love with Cas at once. And they're kissing so bad... 

*

“Singer and Kripke,” says Sam to the police officer. He has no idea why they used so stupid names.

Singer and Kripke have a boner.

*

Dean is nailed. Cas could be jealous but AU!Dean is nailed too, if you know what I mean.

He isn't bleeding from the mouth, so injury isn't deadly, but he asks Sam not to call an ambulance. Why? Because he was inspired by Jack's speech, and he wanna say something cool too. And he watched the finale of The Vampires Diaries, so it's a super original idea when one brother dies.

*

Sam wants to have a kid because 'Dean Albus Severus' sounds great! He fucks with some random woman who gives him a son later. Then he erases her from the existence and from all photos. Dean Jr. thinks he's an alien without a mother.

*

“It's the Heaven you deserve,” says Bobby. It's a lie because Dean doesn't deserve for that shit. “You can meet your abusive father right there, and drink more crappy beer... There is your car, so you can do everything what you did on Earth.”

“And what about Cas?” asks Dean with hope.

“CUT!” yells Singer (the director, not uncle Bobby!).

Andrew Dabb is smirking because only he knows that he puts Dean in the Hell, actually.

*

Everything is okay.

Cas is fucking with AU!Dean because he's too dumb to find a difference.

AU!Dean is happy as fuck, and he doesn't say Cas anything.

AU!Sam is blessing a kale.

Dean is in the Heaven. He's drinking a shitty beer with Bobby and his abusive father.

Sam has a poodle on his head.

Eileen... Who the hell is Eileen, the real love of Sam Winchester, a badass hunter and awesome character?

Writers of Game of Thrones are laughing.

The CW has no balls.

Fans are screaming.

I'm sobbing into a pillow.

Nothing is okay.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't have any explanation for writing this, but it's 1 a.m. here...


End file.
